http://allthesigns.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] allthesigns.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] misfitted 2011-12-19 11:55 pm (UTC)

asldkfja LMFAO /says nothing ;xxxxxxxxx

[And he shouldn't have to handle them. She wouldn't want him to.

Aside from that night Elizabeth and Josef died, when the Calling's near a reset, Sarah is aware enough to avoid people when it gets really bad, or there's just so much exhaustion she sleeps it off anyway. It has nothing to do with not wanting help or not trusting or any of that.

It's just too much for any one person.

She thinks most angels and demons do something similar unless the Calling forces you outside, forces you to find a victim.

You have to protect the people you care about.

Even if that sometimes means protecting them from yourself. Especially then.]


Yeah, that makes sense. It does. I'm still hoping we can find a way that you don't... get to have them that much anymore, if at all. [And she glances up at him, surprised by his question, the way he asks it, and shakes her head, almost smiling at him guiltily.] Nothing. I was just trying to piece everything together.

[She's thinking about a lot of things but until she can put them together in a manner that remotely resembles something cohesive, they're just things she's trying to piece together. If there's something she thinks will help, she'll tell him.]

If it helps, I'm pissed, too? [... Sarah, that is not helpful :|

But no, she is. Pissed at Damon for snapping his neck, pissed teenagers like Jeremy and Elizabeth get shot and killed and they're not even to blame for why those guns are charging forward in the first place, pissed at the world for being as sucky as it can be sometimes.

Pissed that she can still feel like sometimes it's so pointless when it ends doomed, when it ends in death and madness, and she just read a book about all the reasons why it's not pointless and she believes that.]


That's kind of scary. How much someone, anyone can change, depending on the circumstances you're given. [No one's born with evil or hate inside of them. It's made. Made by the world, or made by whatever reasons but it's something that turns you into someone unrecognizable.

She wonders if that could ever happen to her. She secretly thinks it could.

When she hates, she hates.]


Me too. I took fencing lessons but that was... a really long time ago.

[She tilts her head as if thinking back, because fencing is a thing amongst trust fund babies, don't you know, and while she hated everything trust fund baby, she kind of liked those, and then she smiles back at him, just as fondly.

Sarah bites the insides of her cheeks and nods at him, looking up at the ceiling still because there's that feeling like there are needles in her throat. He's right and she knows it, and he lost his parents so there's no way that he can't understand what it's like to have that absence of both.]
I know. I just.

[And she hates what she's about to say, what it sounds like why am i so easy to leave behind?, it's so teenager and emo but.] It was so easy for him.

[It's when he answers her that she turns sideways again to face him.] I think so. I mean, I know somewhere deep down I'm sad and angry about it, I just... can't bring myself to feel it.

[Sarah also can't quite bring herself to smile back, but her expression toward him, aimed at him, is warm. It was the first place she thought of moving. It means more people, a lot more people, people that die and go missing all the time but Charlie's there and they can do good and that's

It's comforting. It is. She wants to do good. She does.]


Guess so. And hey, there's a lot of morbid, interesting, strange conversations I can have with ghosts. They'll be my minions before you know it.

[She's not serious. Not... really.

Sarah swallows past that still-there-feeling. Needles in her throat. But it breaks into a smile, a genuine, warm, almost bright smile when he says her name like that.]


Okay. [Quiet, but so earnest. She'll stay with him for Christmas. What was left of her family is long gone now but she can spend it with him and his.

She's not alone, and he always reminds her of the fact.]


Thank you, Jeremy. For all sorts of things.

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